You’d think that would mean that I would have all the time in the world to blog, blog, blog. However, after being stuck in the house for almost a week the last thing I wanted to do was sit in front of a computer. Also, two of the appointments I had scheduled were cancelled because there was no power in the area. I guess that was a good enough reason to have to cancel! Besides, we were not able to get out of the 2 feet of snow packed in around our house until Monday morning anyway. Today, they were both rescheduled for this coming weekend. At least that part is back on track.
So what else have I been trying to do while I have been snowed in? Well, I have been trying to get an appointment with the priest of the church where we hope to get married. This has been quite the process because we were not members at any particular church prior to this. So what is so difficult about this? Well let me tell you. I am Methodist. Joe is Catholic. The church ceremony is very important to Joe. While I wanted an outside ceremony, I know this is something that means a lot to him. We started going to churches in the area and found one close to our house that we both love. I called to find out how to register Joe as a member. We also found out that Catholic churches will not accept you as a member unless you are within their parish limits unless permission is obtained from the parish whose limits you do live within.
After learning that, we contacted the church closest to us to get permission. He had to speak directly to the priest of that parish and explain why he wanted to join another church. They then would send a letter to the church we wish to join. Once that and the registration form was received by the church we wanted to marry in, we had to call to give some basic info to the coordinator who would then forward our info to one of the priests. We are waiting for the priest to get back to us now. As if that wasn’t enough to go through, I found out that the church was a very popular church for weddings, making me nervous that there may not be any available dates. Believe me, I have had numerous headaches and sleepless nights stressing about this. I know we are in the final steps, but I just have no idea if or when we can get married in that church.
Again, I feel like I should offer tips when choosing a church and how to avoid this type of situation.
1. If you think you might someday want to get married in a church, make sure that you join as soon as you can. I know it may seem presumptuous to join a church solely for the potential of a wedding, but you will not have to wait 3 weeks just to get the proper paper work through in order to speak to someone about a date. If you decide to wait, be prepared to have all your other planning held up until you can set a date at the church.
2. Do your research. If your church isn’t one that is always booked up for weddings, you may have a little more leeway. You might be able to consider looking for your reception site first.
3. If you want to get married at a church you do not usually attend, make sure you go to a few masses. Try to go to them at different times too. You will notice that the music can be different at each services. I know I have seen a regular organist, a full band, a children’s choir, and an adult choir. Unless you already plan on getting an outside musician, you will want to hear all of the options before choosing. This is also a good idea if the church has multiple priests. You will want to try to see mass with each of the priests before choosing who will do your service or if you really do like the church enough to book your wedding there.
4. Be persistent! It took numerous phone calls to actually get to this point. If you have to do all of these things before you can meet with the priest, they are not going to call you to see if they can help.