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How to Avoid Becoming a Bridezilla

I literally hate the show Bridezillas. I see it on the TV guide and it makes me cringe. It’s nothing but a bunch of low-class brides looking for their 15 minutes of fame. Who knows if it is even real or if they are acting like that simply to be on TV. The fact of the matter is that 75% of brides are not Bridezillas and may not even experience a fleeting moment of ‘Zilla-hood. I am sure I had a few moments when my hubby questioned whether I was about to explode but overall I was pretty good. I work with A LOT of brides. They all have moments when the stress gets to them and they snap on someone. But let’s be honest, we all have those moments in our daily lives, not just brides. That’s really what it all boils down to… stress. Brides act like that because this is a stressful time. A lot of time and effort goes into wedding planning.

Today, I am going to list the top 5 things to help avoid becoming a Bridezilla. Read. Take notes. Your friends, family and fiancé will thank you.

5. Delegate to your bridesmaids

Are you afraid to ask your bridesmaids to help you with something because you don’t want to bother them? Or you think they are too busy to help? Please ladies. That is what they are there for!! They WANT to help, otherwise they wouldn’t have agreed to be a part of your big day. I am not saying that they should have to devote 10 hours a week to your wedding, but small tasks to help you out when you are feeling overwhelmed is a acceptable. Need help putting together your invitations? Plan an afternoon when all or most of your bridesmaids can come. Serve some yummy cocktails or wine and some light snacks and I can guarantee that they will enjoy it and most importantly, spending time with you.

4. Spend time doing non-wedding related activities

If you live, breathe and eat wedding, what are you going to do when it is over? I have heard so many people say that they wish they could take a work sabbatical to plan their wedding. But let’s be honest, the majority of your wedding planning is going to get done while at work anyway. I’m just saying!!

Don’t spend every waking moment working on DIY projects or talking about your big day. If the only thing you talk about is your wedding, people aren’t going to want to be around you. Remember to ask other people what they are up to, if they have any good news or if they have any fun events coming up. You may be excited about your wedding, but it doesn’t consume everyone else’s lives like it does yours. It is the most important day of YOUR life, not theirs.

3. Stay open minded

I have met some brides who roll their eyes at the slightest hint of a suggestion from someone. Remember, they are only trying to help. You never know when someone might come up with a better idea than you! Don’t be so set on your plan that you miss a great opportunity. Being flexible and open-minded can be really helpful when planning. Say you find the perfect wedding venue and they don’t have your date available. Unless that date has some sort of significance to you and your fiancé, change it! I started out planning for a June wedding. I ended up getting married in July (today actually marks 1 year!!)  because the venue, church and a bridesmaid’s schedule conflicted. Each of these things were more important to me than some date that I randomly picked out of thin air, so I found the first available date where I could have all three. Problem solved.

2. Sit your mothers down early and talk about what YOU want

I know this sounds silly. But when there are two different families who may have conflicting ideas, planning a wedding can be a bit difficult. You and your fiancé are the ones who are going to be in the middle and getting the brunt of it. Cue the frustration…

First, you need to discuss things with your fiancé and make sure the two of you are on the same page. Once you’ve done that, you are ready to sit down with your moms and explain how you would like to see things play out on your wedding day. Review #3 and remember to stay open-minded. However, you will need to be stern and remind them that it is your wedding day, not theirs.

1. Choose good vendors and let them do their jobs

You book vendors because you fall in love with their style, right? So then why on Earth would you try to control the product? There is a difference between giving them your opinion and dictating what they do. Chat with them. Tell them what you love about their ideas and what you don’t. But ultimately, let them to their thing! You would never book someone who’s work you hated, so don’t assume that they can’t provide you with amazing centerpieces, photos, cakes, service without your direction.

The real goal here is to not let wedding planning rule your life. The marriage that follows the wedding is much more important, so focus on your husband-to-be and building a life with him. And don’t forget, if something goes wrong on your wedding day, chances are that you are the only one who is going to notice it. Everyone else will be too busy enjoying the day to realize it. So you should too.



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